


Dark Waters: Short Stories

by faeriexbwnny



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Gen, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:07:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28459503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faeriexbwnny/pseuds/faeriexbwnny
Summary: Short stories about the many things I've dealt with in my years of life, these topics span from depression to sexuality and gender identity. I hope you enjoy, have a great day! <33





	Dark Waters: Short Stories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> idk part 1?

Slight cw:  
Have you ever felt an unbearable emptiness? Such an unbearable darkness that everything around you is covered in fog and drenched in tears, everything you loved one day is out the window and out of mind. You feel as if you’re drowning in dark waters that have no end, everything you’ve worked for is meaningless and everything you want is impossible. You scream out and wish to cry but nothing comes of it, your body refuses the tears until it’s too much and you burst. A water balloon, that’s all you are a bundle of emotions that’s soft to the touch but impossible to break. Life feels worthless, pointless, Why am I here? Why do I continue to fight? What will come of it in the end? Questions you ask daily wondering if it will ever get better. You’re on top of the world and having the time of your life till you slip into this deep dark tunnel, sometimes you may not even notice and one day you wake up covered in fog calling out for something or someone that will never come. You will never be rescued and efforts to stop this feeling will never work, you’re stuck in an inevitable cycle of emptiness and complete happiness. Why am I stuck with such a depressing and dull outlook on life? I look into the fridge and contemplate what to do next, how I’ll get away and even if I did, where would I go in this painfully dreadful nightmare? It’s as if you were to take a palette of all your favorite colors, warm and cool, bright and happy and mix them all together until you have a pile of dogshit brown and empty gray. Why should I keep going? Why do I even bother to wake up? Does this mean anything in the end? Will I end up a corpse in a ditch somewhere if I bother to try? What’s the point of leaving the house when you can watch the days turn weeks and weeks turn to months. You can watch the leaves turn orange and red then back again, you can watch the sunset and the moon rise. Why go outside when everyone only wishes to hurt you? When you’re always victim to something the second you set foot out your door. Nowhere to go, nowhere to hide. This cycle of cherishing the things you have and working for the next, then pushing away the things and ones you love and wondering why they won’t stay. I feel as if the walls are caving in and everything around me is disappearing, I want to stay in bed all day and cry myself to sleep. Nine hours feels too little and twelve too much, I want to stay away from everyone and everything that is capable of hurting me. I’m safe here, but not for long. What will become of me when I leave this space and face the things I’ve pushed away for so long? I push away the ones I love to be less of a burden if I decide life is too much. I’m not being dramatic, I’m hurting but you’re too blind and selfish to care. Telling me I “have it easier” or “my home life is better than most” doesn’t mean I’ve never suffered. Life is tough for everyone but some have the power to stand up and climb over their problems, whether it be a bump or a mountain you still have to hold on and push forward. No matter the nose bleeds or nausea you must keep going, you can’t let the people around you stop you or push you backwards because this is up to you and you have the power to- no.. It’s all so worthless, the colors fade and you’re back where you started, you fall down the cliffside and into the water wondering why you tried again as if it’s ever worked before. What would be different about this time? Why would it finally get better? Why should I even try anymore? Who do I turn to? Who will even listen? Don’t grab the pills, put down the knife, get down from the ledge! It’s as if you wouldn’t be alive without these wonderful words of encouragement. Ending it all seems as if it’s the only right thing to do, but do you have what it takes to do it? Do you have what it takes to never see the light of day? Do you have what it takes to never feel the warmth from the sun on your face again? Do you have what it takes to be shrouded by all the voices in your head in a cold, empty grave?  
~ Thank you for reading! <33


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